 |
Weddings |
|
Create your wedding ceremony to reflect your beliefs and your commitment. |
 |
With the assistance of Rev. Paul J.
Jacobs Ordained Unity Minister 651-773-1170
pjacobs289@aol.com
Preparation
Designing
the ceremony
Planning
Ministers Philosophy
I prefer to use our first meeting to get acquainted & discuss spiritual beliefs and how you want to reflect them in the ceremony. We will also discuss the Prepare/Enrich program.
I highly recommend using the Prepare/Enrich couple inventory to facilitate your communications concerning this commitment. This computer graded inventory checks fifteen areas of relationship and identifies areas of strength and potential growth. It provides some handy tools to begin the marriage using your strengths. It also may reveal some potential pitfalls which you can team up to avoid.
This inventory requires a minimum of three two hour meetings. The first is to establish our purpose and administer the inventory. During the other two meetings we will discuss the information included in the fifteen page report generated by the inventory.
I will provide you with a variety of possible ceremonies and vows. These can be in written form or on computer disk so you can cut, paste, and edit to achieve a ceremony which reflects your spiritual beliefs and your commitment. Or you can write your own vows and design your own ceremony.
The template I have is divided into fifteen possible steps. You can use any or all of these and rearrange them if you like. For each of these steps there are three to seven suggested wordings. You may use one of these as it is or use all of them to create your own wording. You can take the material home and plan at your leisure or we can discuss what you want and I can submit a draft for your editing.
These formats encourage participation of the families and the gathered community. This may vary from a simple "We do" to readings or song.
A wedding is the ultimate mixture of the serious and the ecstatic. At the very time we want to be most present for ourselves and our partner we tend to become overwhelmed with people and activity. Some guidelines to help keep the occasion sacred.
- Get lots of help for your wedding day. Make sure people you trust are responsible for everything on the big day. This way you can relax and enjoy.
- Have everything ready a day ahead and then don’t schedule anything the day before the wedding. Allow yourselves some time for reflection, time to go over your vows, complete any communications which may have been dropped during the rush to prepare.
"Marriage is perhaps the most complex of human relationships. The process of joining two people in a relationship which is intended to last a lifetime can involve great effort." (Prepare/Enrich)
It may involve more than is humanly possible. For this reason I encourage couples to pay more attention to the spiritual aspects of the wedding. Most individuals marry to love, honor and cherish. This intention calls for much more than a legal contract. It calls for a wide variety of virtues which most traditions indicate are the fruits of Spirit.
I do all I can to make a wedding a sacred occasion, invoking Spirit. A spiritual marriage is a sacred contract between souls which no man can put asunder. It will be fulfilled whether the couple is together or apart. It is larger than the relationship of the two people. For this reason it is fitting that we devote time and attention to opening ourselves to Spirit before and during this ceremony.
"You were born together, and together you shall be forevermore.
You shall be together when the white wings of death scatter your days.
Ay, you shall be together even in the silent memory of God.
But let there be spaces in your togetherness,
And let the winds of the heavens dance between you." (Kahlil Gibran)